Monday, June 15, 2015

Putting yourself out there

Funny how you start thinking about something and the pieces just start coming together.  You find similarities between people and you just wonder why no one ever talked about any of their issues before.  I know...some people are private and others are just brought up that way or told to keep their mouth shut.

When I first started writing in this blog, it had to do a lot about my weight loss.  But it has become much more about the journey and everything that entails.  It has taught me a lot about myself...things that I haven't dealt with or that I'm dealing with now.  And as much as I dislike it,  I'm trying to embrace it!  If that makes sense...

Not everyone is comfortable looking within themselves.  And I know a few people who have went to therapy and stopped going cause they didn't want to place any blame on themselves.  It is so much easier to throw that on someone else.  And I was, key word WAS, like that.  I liked to blame everyone else for a lot of things.  My parents, my upbringing, my ex husband, past boyfriends, and etc.

I have shared so much of myself on here and a little part of me thinks that I shouldn't have.  That is the fearful part of me, the "what will they think" part of me, the unsure me.  But you can't help people if you don't put yourself out there.  And I find comfort in knowing others who have had a similar journey as my own.

I underestimate myself.  When I'm having a rough day and I start feeling rather overwhelmed with life and the tears are flowing like a faucet...then I feel rather weak.  I don't feel strong!  But I guess it's rather courageous to deal with one's flaws, one's imperfections.  Strong is not what you can lift.  Strong is going through life's struggles and coming out the other side better than you were before.

So...even if I can help one person by putting my struggles, my journey out feel that they aren't alone in their journey, their self-discovery...then so be it!  Part of me getting comfortable with being me, being comfortable in my own skin!